Hopeless

At the edge of the world

If only I can think this way
Sometimes I feel like insanely stupid, great big failure and worthless piece of shit. Whenever I feel this way, I just feel like…giving up

I make mistakes and failed it in my life. Can I ever be successful in the future? I have failed so many things in life that’s uncountable. I failed in my driving parking in March and I have to admit

The first time I failed driving was a disaster coz all the times I learned extra long hours and even sacrifice one of my Chinese new year day to just to learn it. All these lessons have gone down the drain. I have choose the wrong driving school, such a BIG MISTAKE!! Troublesome! GOSH! I’m so stress right now. Whenever I LOOKED at people driving, I would felt a touch of envy in my eyes coz I wish I can be on the seat one day and bringing myself to places I wanted to. People used to say that when you’re driving, your life depend on the road coz if you make the biggest mistake, you lose your life. I am not in a rush to get license but for the sake that I have to force myself to remember how to use manual car and the memorizing the number of poles to looked at in parking is tiring indeed.
I’m at the edge of falling into pieces sooner or later. I just feel like if I fail again, I could give up completely. Maybe I’m just born to be worthless and useless. Sometimes I FEEL like I should be the one that leaves instead of dad. Since I’m so useless and have been a failure since I was a child. What’s the point of living.

I appreciated LIFE but life doesn’t appreciated me..

Every time my mind could reflect to the words of people who said that to me. The words ‘stupid, useless and worthless’ hurts me and it kinda make sense to me that I’m really is a hopeless girl. Maybe if one day I disappeared, everything will be much better coz there’s one worthless human being eliminate in this planet.